Mary Anne Radmacher
3 Tips for Reframing your New Year's ResolutionsPosted January 10, 2017 by Valarie Bittner M.A. CPC
Welcome to Westwind's 2017 recovery blog! We're excited for the start of another year, and more opportunities to be part of the recovery journey for so many courageous women.
As the new year starts, we're all aware of the bombardment in advertising and social media, promising a "new you" with the right new year's resolution. There are appeals everywhere to re-make your body, career or relationships, often in a few steps and for a few (or more) dollars! If you’re like many people, you've experienced the let down that comes a few weeks after these resolutions are made, that leaves a feeling of failure and disappointment when the results you wanted didn't happen. This can leave us feeling incapable and unmotivated.
When you choose to let go of goals that don't serve you, it frees you pursue self acceptance and the pursuits that you truly value. Below are three tips for setting goals that reflect your passions, priorities and values in life, without setting yourself up for self-sabotage!
1. Is the pace of my goal setting realistic and attainable?
Set manageable size goals, rather than looking only to the end goal. When you aim for a goal that requires a "stretch" but not three steps beyond you, it will be within reach and realistic to aim for. Also, certain pursuits may not be within your ability to control or make happen. For instance, if your goal is to win the lotto you can purchase a ticket and influence your odds but you can't not control the outcome.
2. Am I recognizing all my accomplishments and progress – big and small?
It's so valuable to give ourselves credit for all our accomplishments and achievements. At times, our self-critical voice tries to say our achievements are not sufficient. Every step counts towards moving forward. When we acknowledge our accomplishments, we challenge any perfectionistic thinking that distorts our view.
3. How's my attitude and response when I slip up?
Some slip-ups are inevitable when you're learning something new. You can choose to approach a set back with self compassion, curiosity and openness to gain insights into what contributed to the slip up. One way to practice this is by sharing with a friend or support.